TIFU soaking my room in pee

This happened a few hours ago, and damn, I'm stupid.

About a month ago, I got a bladder infection. Although bladder infections suck, it wasn't the end of the world - I just ended up going to the bathroom every 10 minutes to relieve myself of the 3 drops sitting in the tank. As a college student, going to the doctor during midterm season wasn't really on the top of my list, so I decided I'd wait it out.

It went pretty well, until one of the people I live with had to shower. At first I tried holding it, but after a while, I thought screw it, I'm not waiting, and I proceeded to pee into an old bottle I had lying around.

Now I'm not proud of this next part, but I really really enjoyed peeing into a bottle. So much that it became a habit. At first it felt a little weird, but after a while, it just became normal. I started buying apple juice bottles on a regular basis, so when I was done, I could piss back into them, and no one would ask any questions. I had a wall of them lined up in my room.

I'm not crazy, I swear. I would take them down to the trash every week or so, it wasn't a trophy collection or anything like that. I know I sound insane, but it's just a feeling you don't know until you've tried it.

Flash forward to a month down the road, when I've become so used to this habit that it doesn't even cross my mind anymore. My roommate was in the shower, and I had to go pee, bad. It was morning pee, and I was just having such a hard time holding it. I looked around, and didn't see any bottles, so I grabbed the nearest cup. I didn't want it to stink up my room, so I put a plate on top to cover up the smell.

I was in the middle of exam season, so I just left it there. That's right, I left a cup of piss just sitting there on my dresser for 3 days while I studied for what I thought was more important. I didn't even think twice, I didn't even remember it was there.

Then shit went down (or piss, in a more literal sense).

Earlier today I was tidying up my room (procrasticleaning), and I bumped my dresser. I was facing away, but I heard the sound of the plate hitting the ground. That's when it all came back to me. Before this, I had never believed that time could slow down in those special moments, but it definitely did. As I whipped my head around, I watched the cup rolling on the counter, the pee flowing in every direction, almost like in a Gatorade commercial.

That initial moment of shock passed, and in my mind, I treated it like I had spilled some juice. Then it clicked. Shit. Holy mother of piss. There was urine all over everything. Like, everything. I've attached a diagram to truly capture what I had gotten myself into.

Spilling on the dresser? No big deal, we got wet wipes for that shit. Spilling on my toiletries? Damn that's gross by we can clean that shit. Spilling on $1500 worth of textbooks? That's when the oh shit what have I done started to set in. That, and the soaked carpet. And the open dressers.

Since then, I've cleaned the dressers, done 4 loads of laundry, scrubbed the carpet almost 6 times now. At the moment, I'm blow-drying the pages of one textbook while I try to read another.

How it went down

tldr; Peed all over my rented textbooks to prove I'm the true alpha

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